Friday, August 21, 2009

Shadowfun, I think not.

Shadowrun is not fun. Shadowrun + fun is not Shadowfun.

What used to be a compelling Action RPG back from the NES days turned into a strictly Team Deathmatch game. The singleplayer mode in this game consists of Team Deathmatch with bots (and you can't get achievements this way).

The closest game to Shadowrun for the Xbox 360 is probably counterstrike. The difference between this game and other TDM games is the magic factor. In this game you can teleport around, resurrect teammates, summon minions and stuff. Instead of watching the corners for enemies, you'll need to have a 360 degree field of vision because enemies can teleport from the floor, the ceiling, through walls, etc.

Teamplay is essential here, since defensive magic (resurrection / healing tree) is beneficial to the team. Instead of killing a team of five, you might have to kill up to 15 enemies since the enemies keep on resurrecting dead teammates.

This simple logic makes resurrection the most important spell in the game.

Typical 8v8 shadowrun experience:
IF most members can make it to the center of the map and wipe themselves out. The remaining players (average two on each side) on the enemy team revives the players that died in the gunfight. The remaining players on your team runs around the map trying to find a place to snipe, since they never bothered to buy resurrection.
The remaining players usually:
1. Hide until time runs out.
2. Get killed.
3. Gang raped by 8 enemies.

Common Shadowrun logic dictates that the money spent on team spells should be used to buy weapons and gadgets because "I don't want to be a healer. I want to get frags. My teammates can do the healing for me." The end result is nobody buys resurrection and the scenario above occurs until you lose the game.


I prefixed the first sentence because around 1/5 of the time you get betrayed by your teammates for no apparent reason. So someone betrays you, you get them back the next round. Eye for an eye, playing field is even, EXCEPT YOUR TEAMMATES ACT LIKE LITTLE CHILDREN (Minion Preacher) AND CONTINUE TO HARASS YOUR TEAMMATES EVERY ROUND. JEESUS KID GROW UP ALREADY.

I can't get a god damn win because:
1. You are shooting me and I have no health.
2. we're down 2-3 teammates due to griefing. 8 v 5 of us makes us lose.
3. Making us lose forces me to spend my money rebuying weapons.
4. Trying to dodge your bullets every round gives the enemy times to set up an assault.

Conclusion:

Note: This game initially sold for $60.



Quote:
The most important thing is the value of what you're getting, I think there is value there at the $60 price point. If you play just about any first person, next-generation shooter that's come out recently, you're looking at the single player game being about 10 hours. I've been playing Shadowrun for three years... You can see this game truly has legs. So, ten hours of gameplay for sixty bucks, plus some probably lame multiplayer they tacked on, versus Shadowrun that you can play, lets [sic] say, for years.


from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shadowrun_(2007_video_game)

Things wrong with this statement:
1. Lame multiplayer also applies to Shadowrun.
2. You can play any game for 3 years (ex. tetris).
3. Single player campaign lets you play by yourself without xbox live ANYTIME!
4. You're paying full price for half a game.
5. $60 for 3 year logic also applies to any other game.
6. You can't play "whenever you want" if not enough people are playing, you could just end up waiting for a game indefinitely.

I also like to point out that FASAstudio, the company that made this game, is out of buisness.

This logic + shitty teammates + griefers + lag makes shadowrun multiplayer a crappy experience. More power to you if you can find a static team to play with.

Last words:

Minion Preacher: You are a loser. Stop acting like a pre-pubescent 13 year old. You're like the KKK, nobody wants to be on your side (team). Go do yourself a favor and disconnect your router, it will make the world a better place to live in.
Note: I didn't say "go kill yourself." because I need people to work at fast food restaurants. I mean, my chicken soft tacos aren't going to make themselves are they?
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Monday, August 3, 2009

Mushroom Kingdom sex tape scandal.


I think the title explains it pretty well. NSFW and all that, but goddamn hilarious.
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